War Minus the Shooting: It’s a Funny Old Game

With football season over and baseball season about to begin, that means only one thing:  it’s time for the 2011 Funny Name All-Stars announcements!

MAJOR LEAGUE SOCCER FUNNY NAME ALL-STARS

• Chicago Fire: Corben Bone, Baggio Husidic, Kwame Watson-Siriboe
• Chivas USA: Kevin Guppy
• Colorado Rapids: Nane Joseph Nane
• Columbus Crew: Dilly Duka
• DC United: Fred
• FC Dallas: George John
• Houston Dynamo: Hunter Freeman
• Los Angeles Galaxy: Donovan Ricketts
• New England Revolution: Kenney Mansally
• New York Red Bulls: Tim Ream, Sinisa Ubiparipovic
• Philadelphia Union: Amobo Okugo
• Portland Timbers: Bright Dike
• Real Salt Lake: Paolo Jr.
• San Jose Earthquakes: Andre Andre Luis
• Seattle Sounders FC: Terry Boss, Jhon Kennedy Hurtado
• Sporting Kansas City: Teal Bunbury, Zoltan Zoltan
• Toronto FC: Nana Attakora
• Vancouver Whitecaps FC: Jonathan Leathers

MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL FUNNY NAME ALL-STARS

• Arizona Diamondbacks: J.J. Putz
• Atlanta Braves: Jair Jurrjens
• Baltimore Orioles: Felix Pie, Rick VandenHurk
• Boston Red Sox: Jarrod Saltalamacchia
• Chicago Cubs: Kosuke Fukudome, Koyle Hill
• Chicago White Sox: Erick Threets
• Cincinnati Reds: Yonder Alonzo
• Cleveland Indians: Grady Sizemore
• Colorado Rockies: Jhoulys Chacin
• Detroit Tigers: Alberto Albuquerque, Charlie Furbush, Will Rhymes
• Florida Marlins: Burke Badenhop
• Houston Astros: Jason Bourgeois, Wandy Rodriguez
• Kansas City Royals: Melky Cabrera
• Los Angeles Angels: Jason Bulger
• Los Angeles Dodgers: Blake Hawksworth
• Milwaukee Brewers: Yuniesky Betancourt, Prince Fielder
• Minnesota Twins: Jeff Manship
• New York Mets: Lucas Duda, R.A. Dickey
• New York Yankees: Nick Swisher
• Oakland Athletics: Coco Crisp
• Philadelphia Phillies: Antonio Bastardo, Brian Bocock
• Pittsburgh Pirates: Jon Bowker
• St. Louis Cardinals: Skip Schumacher
• San Diego Padres: Chase Headley
• San Francisco Giants: Madison Bumgarner, Buster Posey
• Seattle Mariners: Milton Bradley, Chone Figgins, Doug Fister
• Tampa Bay Rays: Reid Brignach
• Texas Rangers: Pedro Strop, Taylor Teagarden
• Toronto Blue Jays: Jo-Jo Reyes, Marc Rzepczynski
• Washington Nationals: Atahualpa Severino

NATIONAL BASKETBALL ASSOCIATION FUNNY NAME ALL-STARS

• Atlanta Hawks: Zaza Pachulia
• Boston Celtics: Luke Harongody, Von Wafer
• Charlotte Bobcats: DeSagana Diop
• Chicago Bulls: Carlos Boozer
• Cleveland Cavaliers: Jamario Moon
• Dallas Mavericks: Ian Mahinmi
• Denver Nuggets: Arron Afflalo, Renaldo Balkman, Nene Hilario
• Detroit Pistons: Jonas Jerebko
• Golden State Warriors: Acie Law
• Houston Rockets: Chase Bundinger
• Indiana Pacers: Tyler Hansbrough
• Los Angeles Clippers: Rasual Butler, Ike Diogu
• Los Angeles Lakers: Derrick Caracter
• Memphis Grizzlies: Rudy Gay, Hasheem Thabeet
• Miami Heat: Chris Bosh
• Milwaukee Bucks: Keyon Dooling, Luc Richard Mbah a Moute
• Minnesota Timberwolves: Kosta Koufos
• New Jersey Nets: Derrick Favors
• New Orleans Hornets: DJ Mbenga, Quincy Pondexter
• New York Knicks: Kelenna Azubuike
• Oklahoma City Thunder: Nenad Krstic, Thabo Sefolosha
• Orlando Magic: Hedo Turkoglu
• Philadelphia ’76ers: Marreese Speights
• Phoenix Suns: Zabian Dowdell, Marcin Gortat
• Portland Trail Blazers: Patty Mills
• Sacramento Kings: Luther Head, Pooh Jeter
• San Antonio Spurs: Tiago Splitter
• Toronto Raptors: DeMar DeRozan
• Utah Jazz: Kyrylo Fesenko
• Washington Wizards: Andray Blatche, JaVale McGee

NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE FUNNY NAME ALL-STARS

• Arizona Cardinals: Jay Feely, Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie, LaRod Stephens-Howling
• Atlanta Falcons: Coy Wire, Bear Woods
• Baltimore Ravens: Todd Heap
• Buffalo Bills: Jehuu Calucrick, Ed Wang, Mansfield Wrotto
• Carolina Panthers: Captain Munnerlyn, Keith Null
• Chicago Bears: Josh Bullocks, Julius Peppers
• Cincinnati Bengals: Frostee Rucker, Fui Vakapuna
• Cleveland Browns: Ko Quaye
• Dallas Cowboys: Tashard Choice
• Denver Broncos: Knowshon Moreno, Sydquon Thompson
• Detroit Lions: Joe Jon Finley, Sammie Hill
• Green Bay Packers: Brad Chillar, A.J. Hawk
• Houston Texans: Trindon Holliday
• Indianapolis Colts: Kole Heckendorf
• Jacksonville Jaguars: Guy Whimper
• Kansas City Chiefs: Jerheme Urban
• Miami Dolphins: Richie Incognito, Lousaka Polite
• Minnesota Vikings: Adrian Awasom, Cord Parks
• New England Patriots: BenJarvus Green-Ellis
• New Orleans Saints: Jermon Bushrod
• New York Giants: Madison Hedgecock, Ayanga Okpokowuruk, Sage Rosenfels
• New York Jets: D’Brickashaw Ferguson, Drew Willy
• Oakland Raiders: Rock Cartwright, John Condo
• Philadelphia Eagles: Brodrick Bunkley, Moise Fokou
• Pittsburgh Steelers: Maurkice Pouncey, Limas Sweed
• St. Louis Rams: C.J. Ah You, Michael Hoomanawanui
• San Diego Chargers: James Dearth
• San Francisco ’49ers: Travis LaBoy, Lance Long
• Seattle Seahawks: Tyler Polumbus
• Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Kregg Lumpkin, Stylez G White
• Tennessee Titans: Riar Geers, Yamon Figurs
• Washington Redskins: Mike Furrey

NATIONAL HOCKEY LEAGUE FUNNY NAME ALL-STARS

• Anaheim Ducks: Kyle Chipchura
• Atlanta Thrashers: Dustin Byfuglien
• Boston Bruins: Johnny Boychuck
• Buffalo Sabres: Craig Rivet
• Calgary Flames: Jay Bouwmeester
• Carolina Hurricanes: Tuomo Ruutu
• Chicago Blackhawks: Michael Frolik
• Colorado Avalanche: Brandon Yip
• Columbus Blue Jackets: Grant Clitsome
• Dallas Stars: Karlis Skrastins
• Detroit Pistons: Justin Abdelkaber
• Edmonton Oilers: Taylor Chorney, Shawn Horcoff
• Florida Panthers: Keaton Ellerby, Darcy Hordichuk, Marty Reasoner
• Los Angeles Kings: Jonathan Quick
• Minnesota Wild: Cal Clutterbuck, Clayton Stoner
• Montreal Canadiens: Roman Hamrlik
• Nashville Predators: David Legwand, Jordin Tootoo
• New Jersey Devils: Anssi Salmela
• New York Islanders: Jesse Joensuu, Zenon Konopka, Rob Schrempf
• New York Rangers: Mats Zuccarello
• Ottawa Senators: Colin Greening
• Philadelphia Flyers: Darroll Powe, Chris Pronger
• Phoenix Coyotes: Vernon Fiddler, Nolan Yonkman
• Pittsburgh Penguins: Alex Goligoski
• St. Louis Blues: Carlo Colaiacovo, B.J. Crombeen, Nikita Nikitin
• San Jose Sharks: Ben Eager
• Tampa Bay Lightning: Matt Smaby
• Toronto Maple Leafs: Tyler Bozak, Joey Crabb
• Vancouver Canucks: Manny Malhotra
• Washington Capitals: Jason Chimera