Too long; do not read.
The question came over a week ago, from one of my oldest friends: why don’t you write about politics anymore? At first, it struck me as an absurd thing to ask: don’t I write about politics all the damn time? Didn’t I write for one of the internet’s spunkiest lefty …
Life takes you in strange directions, it cannot be denied. I myself used to be a liberal, and a communist before that, in the days when it seemed worthwhile to care about things. But I am an old man now, and it profits me neither in mind or spirit to …
Q. What are they again? A. They are the Seven Deadly sins. Q. No, I mean what are they. Repeat them. A. They are avarice, envy, gluttony, lust, pride, sloth, and wrath. Q. What happened to anger, covetousness, and greed? A. They have been rebranded as wrath, envy, and avarice. …
They were crossing the bridge, on the way to meet the client, and the boy wouldn’t stop talking about Zen. The hotel where the client wanted to meet was just ahead. Anagnostakis liked to walk whenever possible, to avoid the cameras in parking garages. This was one of the many …
I AM DEEPLY HURT BY YOUR CALLING ME A MILK BABY. I AM NOT. BUT I AM A MONSTER. I AM THE “SON OF TWINKLES” I AM A LITTLE “PUSS” WHEN MOTHER TWINKLES GETS DRUNK SHE GETS FRISKY. SHE EATS HER CHILDREN. SOMETIMES SHE PICKS THEM UP BY THE SCRUFF …
Troy: I don’t really remember much about Troy, man. It’s all pretty much a blur. Some bad shit went on over there, that’s all I can tell you. We ‘won’. That’s what they tell me, anyway. All I remember is stabbing a lot of people in the jaw, and a …
How many times have YOU tried to lose weight? How many FAD diets have you forced yourself to follow, only to be disappointed AGAIN and AGAIN? How often have you tried to eat right AND exercise, only to find out that it’s really COLD outside? You DESERVE to look good. …
You are curious! There is no other reason that you are reading this; an inquisitiveness of the mind and spirit has brought you here. And you are blessed! For curiosity is a wonderful thing. Not too much curiousity, of course. One should always recognize the limits of curiosity. As the …
Author’s Note: In 2008, just before the presidential elections, I took a trip (funded in part by a group of troublemaking liberals) to CPAC, the Conservative Political Action Conference, in Washington, DC. My goal was to take massive quantities of drugs and write about my experiences in the belly of …
“Stop tormenting me, you ridiculous contraption!” WHAT IS THE MATTER WILLIAM-WORDSWORTH CANT YOU THINK OF ANYTHING “You know deuced well that I cannot concentrate on my art with your infernal chattering.” OH SO ITS MY FAULT IS IT WILLIAM-WORDSWORTH YES THAT MUST BE IT AND NOT AT ALL THAT YOU …
The Bongiorno Jimmy’s story begins all the way back in September of 1991. It was then that six men, their attorneys, a $4,600,000 startup investment, several bank loans, and an IPO scheme decided that there were a lot of institutional-grade convenience dining establishments, but there weren’t enough institutional-grade convenience dining …
1. JERRY FAN: I love pies 2. JACKY FAN: I also love pies 3. (both eat pies with little enthusiasm) 4. JERRY FAN: This pie would make a good cake *** 1. JERRY FAN: Did you hear Bill’s Bakery fired Baker Bob 2. JACKY FAN: But Baker Bob baked all …
Slavery, it has been properly observed, is America’s original sin. It is our first and foremost crime, the most adjacent cause of our civil war, and the source of the racial poison that continues to choke us today. It is, if this can be said in a way that does …
Stand down, oppressors! Your days of dominance are finished; your time of reckoning is at hand! You have stood on our necks for too long. You have excluded us from many of the finest professions; you have prevented us from becoming educated; you have made us second- and third-class citizens …
Hetty Green was one of the first women to make a killing in stocks. The heir to a considerable whaling fortune, the dour and grim New England Quaker increased her net worth more than tenfold with canny investments in everything from real estate to railroads to war bonds, and when …
