“Hey, you feel like going down to Martha’s Vineyard for the Memorial Day weekend?” “Sure! Oh, that’ll be nice. A beach trip! And we can see my sister. Do you want me to book a flight tomorrow?” “Nah. We’ll just use the transporter.” “Oh, Henry.” “What?” “I don’t know why …
SALES INCREASE UNDERPERFORMS The Household Sundries division reported an all-time high 52% increase in sales this quarter, with strong showings in the cookware and cleaning supplies sectors leading a late-period surge that contributed to the record-setting total. Management notes, however, that its goal for the quarter was a 75% sales …
“Evenin’, Palladius.” “Evenin’, Kevin.” “What can I get for ye this sunny day?” “Wusky, my dear.” “The Jameson, I assume?” “No indeed. Give me the Glenlivet.” “Palladius! You don’t say so.” “I just can’t take it anymore, Kevin. Not another gory day of it. Look at them all, out there …
The Ayn Rand Institute * in conjunction with * The Leonard Peikoff Foundation for Rational Youth Outreach proudly presents: THE 2013 GALTIES (The 15th Annual John Galt Awards for Outstanding Achievement in Objectivism by American Youth) San Diego Airport Hilton – Saturday, August 24th – 8:00 PM – Nominees and guests only …
Hey, there, neighbors! I’m H.I. “Red” Hand, owner and head man in charge of Frederick’s of Rhetoric, and I’m here to tell you: April is the cruellest month, mixing memory and desire — but February is the shortest! And that means that I’ve only got four days left you offer …
People always ask me, “Ruth-Melissa, how did you come to operate the largest chain of Christian-themed pizza-pie parlors in the continental United States?” And I mean always! My neighbors ask me, my friends ask me, my less successful relatives ask me, and you’d better believe that paid undercover operatives of …
Today would have been the 120th birthday of legendary British filmmaker Reginald Sir Coptic Mange. On this momentous occasion I can think of nothing more appropriate than to look back on some of the films that made him one of the titans of the screen. Without further ado, to the …
As part of our ongoing dedication to preserving our nation’s cultural ephemera, LP dot com is pleased to present captions from rejected New Yorker cartoons, 1920-present. “Rodney, for God’s sake, control your Negroes.” “Prepare a standard sodomy clause, Miss Scunthorpe.” “It’s sort of a cook-out, only with horsemeat and machineguns.” “Oh, it …
To follow in the gargantuan footsteps of Barzun’s seminal (not to mention semeinal) work on the significance — and I use the word in its strictest structuralist sense — of the Hostess oeuvre, the immortal From Cupcakes to Chocodiles: The Decade of Difference, seems presumptuous, if not arrogant. And yet, …
7:30PM. Covene third editorial board meeting of the Journal of the Tennessee Alternate History Society. 7:32PM. Announcement of snacks available. Possibility of another snack run later in the evening. Inquiries made about lack of Chee-tos; Senior Editor Johnson assures group that only the hot crunchy Chee-tos were available at the …
Thank you for buying the Small World Guide to British Columbia! Through the years, travel books have continually reinvented themselves in response to a changing audience. Once tailored to an elite, wealthy clientele of high-society travelers, they eventually discovered the tourism-minded middle class and, later, the budget traveler who’s always …
ANIMALS (FANCY) Charger Impala Mustang Viper ANIMALS (GROSS) Beetle ANIMALS (MYTHOLOGICAL) Equus Taurus CHARACTER TRAITS Civic Clarity Fit Insight iQ Smart Soul Speed FOREIGNY Alpina Aventador Cabriolet Cadenza Camaro Fiesta Fiorano Forte Galibier Gallardo Italia Kizashi Mulsanne Panamera Passat Quattroporte Rapide Verano Virage NAMES THE KIDS IN MARKETING CAME UP …
In 1978, as I applied for film studies at the University of Illinois, my father expressed his disapproval. He quoted me a statistic: “Every year, 50,000 performers compete for 200 available roles on Broadway.” Still, I went against his advice and boarded a flight to the U.S. Since then, my …
Hello? Stan! What on earth? Uh…you pick. Stan, I don’t want to play guessing games. Do you know what time it is? In jail? What are you doing in jail? Well, obviously. I didn’t think you just stopped there to use the phone. What did you do to get arrested? …
Greetings, new recruit of the Japanese Defense Force’s Giant Radioactive Monster Battalion! No doubt that you, as a citizen of our great nation, have been raised with many colorful tales of the heroic struggles your predecessors in the G.R.M.B. fought in the 1950s and 1960s. Perhaps this even influenced your …
