WAYS I WISH LIFE WAS MORE LIKE GRAND THEFT AUTO V
Medical bills capped at $5,000 regardless of the extent of the injury
Impossible to gain weight
Commercial radio still features good music, DJs worth listening to
Ability to get away with even the worst crimes by hiding in a garage or alley for 15 minutes
Goal of retiring to huge mansion with $25 million relatively easy to achieve
Death easily avoided by choosing correct option on cell phone
Possible to drive from one end of L.A. to the other in less than four hours
For an additional small fee, cabs able to literally travel at the speed of light
Easy to bend Juggalos to your will
California wildlife not yet completely extinct
WAYS I AM GLAD LIFE IS NOT LIKE GRAND THEFT AUTO V
Police in real life do not shoot all people for any minor moving violation; just black people
Planes and helicopters in real life are not basically impossible to operate
In real life, I am not obligated to jump off of a skyscraper just because some hyper-macho Type A asshole dares me to