So, it’s bores again, did we? A particularly fine-fettled specimen of the bore, who can easily be found in the used clothing and liquor-dispensing sectors of our cluttered metropoli, is The Man Who Saw Them Before They Sold Out. Surely you have seen him, in his all-too-well-fitting pants and his …
And now, this site proudly presents the first of an occassional series of ravings by your crazy uncle Henry, entitled “Henry, You Don’t Mean It”. Henry can be reached at the TV store down by the coffee shop, where he angrily contradicts pre-recorded news broadcasts. *** When I die, I …
The first of an occasional series of posts about crime, both in its real-world manifestations and its portrayal in popular culture. The title of the series comes from the great 1950 noir The Asphalt Jungle, in which the moneyman Roland Emmerich describes crime as “a left-handed form of human endeavor”. *** …
Hi! I’m Blue! You may remember me from the color of a sunny sky, or the clothes you wore when you were a baby if you were a boy, or from the color scheme of a sports team you may enjoy. Perhaps you’re familiar with the feeling of calm and …
Regular readers of this site — hey, you three! — will know that I regularly feature long-form film criticism of movies both old and new. You may not know, however, that I see about ten movies for every one I write about, and time simply doesn’t permit, nor quality …
Sofia Coppola, after an initial period of wunderkind delight, seems to have settled into the role of a director that people want to like more than they actually like her. She followed up the very good The Virgin Suicides with the great Lost in Translation, but that was chased by the problematic Marie Antoinette …
INCIDENT LOG, 06.20 1900 hrs – arrived for duty – relieved Duty Officer Lothar the Civic 1907 hrs – dispatch: Royal Dungeons, Dwarf City of Kang – 12 kobolds – D.O. action: disposal – valuables left at scene: none 2042 hrs – dispatch: Slag Pits of Morthor – 3 firedrakes …
Dealing with the death of famous people is an emotionally thorny proposition. No matter how much you might have cared for their work, you didn’t really know them, and it seems almost intrusive to mourn them the way you would a friend or a family member. And, of course, death comes …
And now, ladies and gentlemen — but especially ladies! — it’s time for an exciting set of Wisdom Flirtinis from the adorable pink leather-bound notebook of Betty Ray Insensata, the Feminist Who’s Unclear on the Concept! “A woman without a man is like Lance Armstrong without a bicycle.” “People call me …
For someone who loves crime drama, downbeat ’70s cinema, and stories of doomed losers as much as I do, it took me an inexplicably long time to get around to seeing Peter Yates’ foundational tale of a bottom-feeding Boston mob hanger-on. The Friends of Eddie Coyle never seemed to crop …
Mr. Speaker, Mr. Chief Justice, President Obama, Vice President Biden, Senator McConnell, Dr. von Hellish, fellow citizens: We observe today not a victory over death but a celebration of life — symbolizing an end as well as a beginning; signifying renewal as well as change. My return to the world …
MON-EL’S BIGGEST COMPLAINTS ABOUT THE THOUSAND YEARS HE SPENT IN THE PHANTOM ZONE 1. No cable 2. General Zod wouldn’t stop telling that one story about how he first decided to become an astronaut 3. Friday Night Fish Surprise was just Mrs. Pal-El’s Fish Sticks with sprig of parsley 4. …
From the 2014 edition of my book series, Frontage Road U.S.A.: Adventures Just Off the Superhighway, I am pleased to present the chapter entitled “Oddest-Named Cities in America”. Special thanks to Jug-o’-Shine Publishing for permission to excerpt this material. Nipples, FL. Originally planned as a cultural and intellectual haven in the …
Dear Ben, The news is nothing but good! Finally got a tenure-track gig, and at a school on the east coast, too! Miskatonic — ever heard of it? Their sciences departments are supposed to be top-rate, but I don’t know a lot about their liberal arts school. Ah well; a …
Conrad Z. Wright The Elite Hotel for Transients 1258 W. Clark Street, Suite # 2nd Floor on Your Right with “WHORS” Carved Into the Door Chicago, IL 60657 (773) 288 4904 when not in use by another resident I have an e-mail address but I don’t know how to work …
